fake haiku

Faux Haiku For You(s)

Introduction: The following works, created between 1999 and 2002, may be understood as sketches for landscapes that will never be completed. This site is dedicated to one38.org and the people of the five7five list who introduced me to the small joy of bad haiku.

Intro: The first set of ten 
(aka "...It was night and I was driving.
The new sun for a December day was an hour away.
You slept.
I watched you as I drove.
Some music played on the radio.
The Florida winter night seemed crisp.
The rate of time that night seemed slower.
I did not want the sun to rise. 
I did not want the next day to begin. 
The next day would be the first one without you.")

Goodbye in airport.
Florida disappears.
Oranges to grey again.

Street of night air again.
Sound floats from distant party.
SHUTTHEFUCKUP mind.

One beer two beer three...
A hobby of mine you might say.
At least its not art.

Counting syllables,
that's not haiku she tells me.
Its all in the twists

Phone call from the south.
Hello...Hello...I miss you.
No twist in this boy.

I'm a funny guy,
faking haiku to you dear.
Think of it as paint

Smoke will fall upwards,
from my mouth to the ceiling
So goes my time here

Desktop of my mac,
buried under deep grey snow.
Deep grey snow I swear

Breakfast in LA,
the world's most perfect bacon.
Shocked to find it here

10.

Now, back to you dear,
living in a shack down south.
Living oaks suit you

The second set of ten 
(aka "If i could pray I would.
I would pray to the summer, the sea, the atoms in your hair, the sun, the moon, the cigarettes on my lips, the winter, the snow, the Brooklyn Bridge at night...")

11.

Okay, now get this.
I am one lonely fucker.
No news to most folks.

12.

Plato's cave is here,
with flickering black shadows.
I love a good show.

13.

Click click click whir whir
My Modine heater pops on.
Cold house sings along.

14.

One drop of water,
kissed my forehead this morning.
Commute to work halts.

15.

Duchamp, my old friend,
whisper in my ear again.
"L. H. O. O. Q...."

16.

Brooklyn's night sky waits
to be crossed by jet's light trail.
No stars here tonight

17.

Coffee is my lord.
I do not mean to blaspheme,
but I pray all day.

18.

To sleep on the train,
returning from day at the beach,
my heart is at rest.

19.

There's a certain light,
in air of summer night's start...
You know what I mean?

20.

A shell from the beach,
waits by my Brooklyn window,
an ash tray today

The third set of ten
(aka "Objects for objects")

21.

Bring Bring...Bring Bring...Bring
Little telephone calls me.
Black plastic life line

22.

White mug made of clay,
holds the warmth of my mouth.
Thinking of summer

23.

Laminated wood,
the stuff my dreams are made of.
Time to buy a saw

24.

Operating system,
something unseen and distant
A haiku for you

25.

Icon on desktop,
small folder contains this work,
selected as "open"

26.

One match two match three
Smell of fire is faint here
An ash falls to me

27.

Electric heater,
waits quite near my bed tonight.
April ends its work

28.

Large hole made by moth,
on all-time favorite sweater,
matches the paint stains

29.

Black hooded sweatshirt,
smelling fresh from a washing...
damp,clean and perfect

30.

All Umbrellas open,
rerouting the rain tonight,
our shoes still feel wet
 
The fourth set of ten
(aka another night in another town for another kiss)

A crowd at nightfall,
moves  quickly counterclockwise... 
party and riot

32.

Back seat of a cab,
perfect for kissing you know.
Driver ignores road

33.

Some bars are to bright,
although they seem fine for drinks,
but not tonight dear

34.

My dearest robot,
this sad haiku is for you.
Can you tell it fails?

35.

Ohio was home,
flat as a slab of cement.
I am here tonight.

36.

East from New York rain,
she drives back to San Fran sky.
New rear view mirror

37.

Jets have been falling,
so says the t.v. station. 
My hands hold yours dear

38.

Attention all cars,
I am walking down the street,
Drunk Drunk Drunk again.

39.

River in the night,
black water runs under bridge.
No sound is made here

40.

Red flashing strobe light,
around and around it spins.
Run away my dear

The fifth set of ten (some acts to pass the time before sleep)

41.

Saturday morning
coffee first, then studio.
Soon it will be night.

42.

Gallery opens.
Painter that I kinda know.
Free Rolling Rock beer!

43.

Friend's birthday party.
I will try some small talk now;
"So...Do you like cats?"

44.

Breakfast with my love,
on Sunday morning day break.
Bacon of the gods.

45.

Did I ever say
"Forgive me, I have to run"?
My watch hates my time.

46.

And speaking of time -
I need to sit down and write
but not tonight dear.

47.

Small black alarm clock
Sitting by my bed waiting
Cries "Come to sleep, love"

48.
 New desk at old job
made of plywood fresh paint
My eyes are heavy

49.

chistmass time is done
and now I return to home
night is cold again

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